From Clark Fredericks on facebook ...
I 'unalived' the Boy Scout leader/Police officer who sexually abused me as a child, and I went to jail for it .
For years, I carried a secret that nearly destroyed me. From the ages of 6-12, I was groomed and sexually abused by my Boy Scout leader, who was also a lieutenant in the Sheriff’s Department, a trusted family friend, and a revered member of the community. To everyone around us, he appeared to be a man of authority and integrity. In reality, he was a predator — a hunter of children — hiding in plain sight. Like so many survivors, I stayed silent. Shame kept me quiet. Fear kept me compliant. I learned early that telling the truth, felt more dangerous than carrying it. But silence doesn’t erase trauma, it buries it. And what’s buried doesn’t disappear. It spreads. Over time, that secrecy showed up in my life as self-destruction: addiction, reckless choices, broken relationships, and a constant feeling that I was living two lives; the one people saw, and the one I was barely surviving. Eventually, everything I had buried came rushing back. When I became an adult, I saw my abuser with another young boy, an image that burned itself into my memory and haunted me. It forced me to confront the reality that the abuse hadn’t ended with me. I confronted him, and that confrontation ended in his death. For a long time, I believed that stopping him would bring relief. That confronting the source of my pain, would somehow heal it. It didn’t. You don’t heal trauma by adding more trauma.
I was sentenced to prison and served 5 years. And in that place, where there is nowhere to run, I finally did what I never did as a child: I faced the truth of what happened to me and what it had done to my mind, my choices, and my life. Healing didn’t come all at once. It came through daily work: therapy, accountability, faith, meditation, sobriety, and learning how to live without numbness. I stopped running from my story, and started taking responsibility for my future. After my release, I made a decision: my life would no longer be defined by silence, violence, or prison. It would be defined by service. I became an advocate for survivors, and worked to help change laws so others wouldn’t be silenced by the clock the way I was. Today, I speak publicly; including to law enforcement and prosecutors, about childhood trauma, its long shadow, and what real accountability and rehabilitation can look like. I also reclaimed something I thought I had lost forever. I reunited with the woman I loved years earlier, a love interrupted by secrets and shame, and learned that healing doesn’t just mean surviving. It can mean returning to life. I wrote my memoir, “SCARRED” because silence almost killed me, and because I know how lonely it feels to believe no one will understand. This book isn’t a justification. It’s the truth: what was done to me, what I became, what I did, what it cost, and what it took to heal. If you are carrying something you were never meant to carry alone, please hear this: Tell somebody. #TellSomebody
You can help a child protect themselves from abusers, by gifting them a FREE Tell Somebody book! gofundme.com/GiveAFreeBook
Child abusers, please stop and seek therapy and God.
Parents, talk with and believe your children.
Survivors, seek therapy. 🏽
(To share your story of abuse, message me)
www.TellSomebodyToday.com