THE TRUTH ABOUT EXODUS 21:10 — DOES GOD ALLOW A MAN TO HAVE TWO WIVES?
One verse has caused a lot of confusion:
«“If he take him another wife; her food, her raiment, and her duty of marriage, shall he not diminish.” — Exodus 21:10»
Some people read this and say:
“There! The Bible allows a man to marry another wife.”
But is that really what the verse is teaching?
NO. We must distinguish between what God regulates because of human sin and what God originally designed.
1. EXODUS 21:10 IS A LAW OF PROTECTION — NOT A COMMAND TO TAKE ANOTHER WIFE
Notice what the verse actually says.
It does not say:
«“Go and take another wife.”»
It says, in effect:
«“If he takes another wife, he must not deprive the first woman of her food, clothing, or marital rights.”»
The law is dealing with a situation that already existed and placing restrictions on the man's treatment of the woman.
God's law often regulated situations caused by human sin without presenting those situations as His perfect design.
Think about divorce.
In Matthew 19:8, Jesus said:
«“Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so.”»
That statement is extremely important.
Jesus acknowledged that Moses permitted something, but then immediately took us back to God's original design.
Permission to regulate a fallen situation is not the same thing as God's original intention.
2. THEN WHAT WAS GOD'S DESIGN FROM THE BEGINNING?
We do not begin with Exodus 21.
We begin with Genesis.
God created one man and one woman.
«“Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.”
— Genesis 2:24»
Not three becoming one.
Two.
Jesus confirmed this in Matthew 19:4–6.
When questioned about marriage, Jesus did not point people to Abraham, Jacob, David, or Solomon and say, “Look at how many wives they had.”
He pointed them back to creation:
«“He which made them at the beginning made them male and female.”»
Then:
«“For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh.”»
Jesus' answer takes marriage back to the beginning.
3. THE NEW TESTAMENT MAKES THE PATTERN EVEN CLEARER
1 Corinthians 7:2 says:
«“Let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.”»
And when Paul gives qualifications for church leadership, he says an overseer must be:
«“the husband of one wife.”
— 1 Timothy 3:2»
Why would Christian leadership be held to a standard of marital faithfulness if having multiple wives were God's ideal for believers?
The New Testament consistently presents marriage as a faithful covenant between one husband and one wife.
4. BUT SOME WILL SAY, “WHAT ABOUT ABRAHAM, JACOB AND DAVID?”
This is where we must learn to read the Bible carefully.
The Bible records many things that it does not command us to imitate.
The Bible tells us about murder, deception, adultery, jealousy, and betrayal.
Recording something happened does not mean God approved it.
The same principle applies to polygamy.
Look at the results:
Abraham, Sarah and Hagar — conflict entered the household. (Genesis 16; 21)
Jacob, Leah and Rachel — rivalry and competition developed between the wives. (Genesis 29–30)
Elkanah, Hannah and Peninnah — Peninnah provoked Hannah until she wept. (1 Samuel 1:6–7)
Solomon — his many wives turned his heart away from the LORD. (1 Kings 11:3–4)
The Bible does not hide the consequences.
Where multiple-wife relationships appear, we repeatedly see pain, rivalry, jealousy, competition and division.
5. GOD'S LAW PROTECTED WOMEN EVEN IN A BROKEN SYSTEM
This is one of the important things we should not miss in Exodus 21:10.
Even in a culture where a man could take another wife, God did not allow him to use that situation as an excuse to abandon or mistreat the first woman.
Her:
Food could not be withheld.
Clothing could not be withheld.
Marital rights could not be withheld.
In other words:
“You will not use another woman as an excuse to destroy the dignity and rights of the woman already in your covenant.”
That is protection.
It is not an encouragement to multiply wives.
6. JESUS CALLS US BACK TO THE BEGINNING
This is the key.
When we want to understand God's design for marriage, we should not build our doctrine around what fallen human beings were permitted to do.
We go back to creation.
Genesis → Creation
Matthew → Jesus confirms creation
Ephesians → Marriage reflects Christ and His Church
Paul says:
«“Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it.”
— Ephesians 5:25»
Christ does not teach a husband to keep looking for another woman.
He teaches him to love, sacrifice, protect, cherish and remain faithful to his wife.
7. OUR COUNSEL TO THE CHURCH
To the young man:
Do not enter marriage planning to have two wives.
Choose one woman and love her faithfully.
Do not ask:
“How many wives can I have and still say I am biblical?”
Ask:
“How can I love my wife in a way that honors Christ?”
To the man already in a polygamous household:
Do not abandon your responsibilities or your children.
Do not use this message as an excuse for cruelty or irresponsibility.
Provide. Protect. Take responsibility. Seek God. Seek wise pastoral counsel.
And do not add another wife.
To the hurting wife:
God sees you.
He saw Leah when she was unloved.
He saw Hagar in her distress.
He sees the tears nobody else sees.
Your pain matters to God.
Bring your situation before Him, and seek godly wisdom and support.
FINAL WORD
Exodus 21:10 does not say, “Go and marry another wife.”
It says that IF a man takes another wife, he must not diminish the rights of the woman already there.
That is a regulation of responsibility, not a declaration of God's original marital design.
Jesus settled the direction for us when He said:
«“But from the beginning it was not so.”
— Matthew 19:8»
So let us not build our marriages around what fallen humanity was permitted to do.
Let us return to the beginning.
One man.
One woman.
One flesh.
One covenant.
Faithfulness for life.
And a marriage that reflects the love of Christ.
«“Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously against the wife of his youth.”
— Malachi 2:15»
LET US RETURN TO GOD'S ORIGINAL DESIGN.
Shalom
@ Sa’Konzoni Z Juma Pst.
Cellphone: +254-724-997-961
E-mail: konzuma243@gmail.com
Impact Church Shipala.
KMG.-KENYA.
One verse has caused a lot of confusion:
«“If he take him another wife; her food, her raiment, and her duty of marriage, shall he not diminish.” — Exodus 21:10»
Some people read this and say:
“There! The Bible allows a man to marry another wife.”
But is that really what the verse is teaching?
NO. We must distinguish between what God regulates because of human sin and what God originally designed.
1. EXODUS 21:10 IS A LAW OF PROTECTION — NOT A COMMAND TO TAKE ANOTHER WIFE
Notice what the verse actually says.
It does not say:
«“Go and take another wife.”»
It says, in effect:
«“If he takes another wife, he must not deprive the first woman of her food, clothing, or marital rights.”»
The law is dealing with a situation that already existed and placing restrictions on the man's treatment of the woman.
God's law often regulated situations caused by human sin without presenting those situations as His perfect design.
Think about divorce.
In Matthew 19:8, Jesus said:
«“Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so.”»
That statement is extremely important.
Jesus acknowledged that Moses permitted something, but then immediately took us back to God's original design.
Permission to regulate a fallen situation is not the same thing as God's original intention.
2. THEN WHAT WAS GOD'S DESIGN FROM THE BEGINNING?
We do not begin with Exodus 21.
We begin with Genesis.
God created one man and one woman.
«“Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.”
— Genesis 2:24»
Not three becoming one.
Two.
Jesus confirmed this in Matthew 19:4–6.
When questioned about marriage, Jesus did not point people to Abraham, Jacob, David, or Solomon and say, “Look at how many wives they had.”
He pointed them back to creation:
«“He which made them at the beginning made them male and female.”»
Then:
«“For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh.”»
Jesus' answer takes marriage back to the beginning.
3. THE NEW TESTAMENT MAKES THE PATTERN EVEN CLEARER
1 Corinthians 7:2 says:
«“Let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.”»
And when Paul gives qualifications for church leadership, he says an overseer must be:
«“the husband of one wife.”
— 1 Timothy 3:2»
Why would Christian leadership be held to a standard of marital faithfulness if having multiple wives were God's ideal for believers?
The New Testament consistently presents marriage as a faithful covenant between one husband and one wife.
4. BUT SOME WILL SAY, “WHAT ABOUT ABRAHAM, JACOB AND DAVID?”
This is where we must learn to read the Bible carefully.
The Bible records many things that it does not command us to imitate.
The Bible tells us about murder, deception, adultery, jealousy, and betrayal.
Recording something happened does not mean God approved it.
The same principle applies to polygamy.
Look at the results:
Abraham, Sarah and Hagar — conflict entered the household. (Genesis 16; 21)
Jacob, Leah and Rachel — rivalry and competition developed between the wives. (Genesis 29–30)
Elkanah, Hannah and Peninnah — Peninnah provoked Hannah until she wept. (1 Samuel 1:6–7)
Solomon — his many wives turned his heart away from the LORD. (1 Kings 11:3–4)
The Bible does not hide the consequences.
Where multiple-wife relationships appear, we repeatedly see pain, rivalry, jealousy, competition and division.
5. GOD'S LAW PROTECTED WOMEN EVEN IN A BROKEN SYSTEM
This is one of the important things we should not miss in Exodus 21:10.
Even in a culture where a man could take another wife, God did not allow him to use that situation as an excuse to abandon or mistreat the first woman.
Her:
Food could not be withheld.
Clothing could not be withheld.
Marital rights could not be withheld.
In other words:
“You will not use another woman as an excuse to destroy the dignity and rights of the woman already in your covenant.”
That is protection.
It is not an encouragement to multiply wives.
6. JESUS CALLS US BACK TO THE BEGINNING
This is the key.
When we want to understand God's design for marriage, we should not build our doctrine around what fallen human beings were permitted to do.
We go back to creation.
Genesis → Creation
Matthew → Jesus confirms creation
Ephesians → Marriage reflects Christ and His Church
Paul says:
«“Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it.”
— Ephesians 5:25»
Christ does not teach a husband to keep looking for another woman.
He teaches him to love, sacrifice, protect, cherish and remain faithful to his wife.
7. OUR COUNSEL TO THE CHURCH
To the young man:
Do not enter marriage planning to have two wives.
Choose one woman and love her faithfully.
Do not ask:
“How many wives can I have and still say I am biblical?”
Ask:
“How can I love my wife in a way that honors Christ?”
To the man already in a polygamous household:
Do not abandon your responsibilities or your children.
Do not use this message as an excuse for cruelty or irresponsibility.
Provide. Protect. Take responsibility. Seek God. Seek wise pastoral counsel.
And do not add another wife.
To the hurting wife:
God sees you.
He saw Leah when she was unloved.
He saw Hagar in her distress.
He sees the tears nobody else sees.
Your pain matters to God.
Bring your situation before Him, and seek godly wisdom and support.
FINAL WORD
Exodus 21:10 does not say, “Go and marry another wife.”
It says that IF a man takes another wife, he must not diminish the rights of the woman already there.
That is a regulation of responsibility, not a declaration of God's original marital design.
Jesus settled the direction for us when He said:
«“But from the beginning it was not so.”
— Matthew 19:8»
So let us not build our marriages around what fallen humanity was permitted to do.
Let us return to the beginning.
One man.
One woman.
One flesh.
One covenant.
Faithfulness for life.
And a marriage that reflects the love of Christ.
«“Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously against the wife of his youth.”
— Malachi 2:15»
LET US RETURN TO GOD'S ORIGINAL DESIGN.
Shalom
@ Sa’Konzoni Z Juma Pst.
Cellphone: +254-724-997-961
E-mail: konzuma243@gmail.com
Impact Church Shipala.
KMG.-KENYA.
📖🔥 THE TRUTH ABOUT EXODUS 21:10 — DOES GOD ALLOW A MAN TO HAVE TWO WIVES?
One verse has caused a lot of confusion:
«“If he take him another wife; her food, her raiment, and her duty of marriage, shall he not diminish.” — Exodus 21:10»
Some people read this and say:
“There! The Bible allows a man to marry another wife.”
But is that really what the verse is teaching?
NO. We must distinguish between what God regulates because of human sin and what God originally designed.
🔥 1. EXODUS 21:10 IS A LAW OF PROTECTION — NOT A COMMAND TO TAKE ANOTHER WIFE
Notice what the verse actually says.
It does not say:
«“Go and take another wife.”»
It says, in effect:
«“If he takes another wife, he must not deprive the first woman of her food, clothing, or marital rights.”»
The law is dealing with a situation that already existed and placing restrictions on the man's treatment of the woman.
God's law often regulated situations caused by human sin without presenting those situations as His perfect design.
Think about divorce.
In Matthew 19:8, Jesus said:
«“Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so.”»
That statement is extremely important.
Jesus acknowledged that Moses permitted something, but then immediately took us back to God's original design.
Permission to regulate a fallen situation is not the same thing as God's original intention.
🔥 2. THEN WHAT WAS GOD'S DESIGN FROM THE BEGINNING?
We do not begin with Exodus 21.
We begin with Genesis.
God created one man and one woman.
«“Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.”
— Genesis 2:24»
Not three becoming one.
Two.
Jesus confirmed this in Matthew 19:4–6.
When questioned about marriage, Jesus did not point people to Abraham, Jacob, David, or Solomon and say, “Look at how many wives they had.”
He pointed them back to creation:
«“He which made them at the beginning made them male and female.”»
Then:
«“For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh.”»
Jesus' answer takes marriage back to the beginning.
🔥 3. THE NEW TESTAMENT MAKES THE PATTERN EVEN CLEARER
1 Corinthians 7:2 says:
«“Let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.”»
And when Paul gives qualifications for church leadership, he says an overseer must be:
«“the husband of one wife.”
— 1 Timothy 3:2»
Why would Christian leadership be held to a standard of marital faithfulness if having multiple wives were God's ideal for believers?
The New Testament consistently presents marriage as a faithful covenant between one husband and one wife.
🔥 4. BUT SOME WILL SAY, “WHAT ABOUT ABRAHAM, JACOB AND DAVID?”
This is where we must learn to read the Bible carefully.
The Bible records many things that it does not command us to imitate.
The Bible tells us about murder, deception, adultery, jealousy, and betrayal.
Recording something happened does not mean God approved it.
The same principle applies to polygamy.
Look at the results:
🔴 Abraham, Sarah and Hagar — conflict entered the household. (Genesis 16; 21)
🔴 Jacob, Leah and Rachel — rivalry and competition developed between the wives. (Genesis 29–30)
🔴 Elkanah, Hannah and Peninnah — Peninnah provoked Hannah until she wept. (1 Samuel 1:6–7)
🔴 Solomon — his many wives turned his heart away from the LORD. (1 Kings 11:3–4)
The Bible does not hide the consequences.
Where multiple-wife relationships appear, we repeatedly see pain, rivalry, jealousy, competition and division.
🔥 5. GOD'S LAW PROTECTED WOMEN EVEN IN A BROKEN SYSTEM
This is one of the important things we should not miss in Exodus 21:10.
Even in a culture where a man could take another wife, God did not allow him to use that situation as an excuse to abandon or mistreat the first woman.
Her:
✅ Food could not be withheld.
✅ Clothing could not be withheld.
✅ Marital rights could not be withheld.
In other words:
“You will not use another woman as an excuse to destroy the dignity and rights of the woman already in your covenant.”
That is protection.
It is not an encouragement to multiply wives.
🔥 6. JESUS CALLS US BACK TO THE BEGINNING
This is the key.
When we want to understand God's design for marriage, we should not build our doctrine around what fallen human beings were permitted to do.
We go back to creation.
Genesis → Creation
Matthew → Jesus confirms creation
Ephesians → Marriage reflects Christ and His Church
Paul says:
«“Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it.”
— Ephesians 5:25»
Christ does not teach a husband to keep looking for another woman.
He teaches him to love, sacrifice, protect, cherish and remain faithful to his wife.
❤️ 7. OUR COUNSEL TO THE CHURCH
To the young man:
Do not enter marriage planning to have two wives.
Choose one woman and love her faithfully.
Do not ask:
“How many wives can I have and still say I am biblical?”
Ask:
“How can I love my wife in a way that honors Christ?”
To the man already in a polygamous household:
Do not abandon your responsibilities or your children.
Do not use this message as an excuse for cruelty or irresponsibility.
Provide. Protect. Take responsibility. Seek God. Seek wise pastoral counsel.
And do not add another wife.
To the hurting wife:
God sees you.
He saw Leah when she was unloved.
He saw Hagar in her distress.
He sees the tears nobody else sees.
Your pain matters to God.
Bring your situation before Him, and seek godly wisdom and support.
🔥 FINAL WORD
Exodus 21:10 does not say, “Go and marry another wife.”
It says that IF a man takes another wife, he must not diminish the rights of the woman already there.
That is a regulation of responsibility, not a declaration of God's original marital design.
Jesus settled the direction for us when He said:
«“But from the beginning it was not so.”
— Matthew 19:8»
So let us not build our marriages around what fallen humanity was permitted to do.
Let us return to the beginning.
One man.
One woman.
One flesh.
One covenant.
Faithfulness for life.
And a marriage that reflects the love of Christ.
«“Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously against the wife of his youth.”
— Malachi 2:15»
🔥 LET US RETURN TO GOD'S ORIGINAL DESIGN.
Shalom 🙏
@ Sa’Konzoni Z Juma Pst.
Cellphone: +254-724-997-961
E-mail: konzuma243@gmail.com
Impact Church Shipala.
KMG.-KENYA.
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